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Full Court Press

California is making a Mad Dash to Insolvency… This new push to keep LA County closed for business is nothing short of the prelude to a Demanded Bailout from the Federal Government (Read YOU and ME).

Governor Newsome (CA-D) and Mayor Garcetti (CA-D) see COVID-19 as their opportunity to demand a bailout from the American Taxpayers for almost 100-years of failed Socialist policies and Profoundly Wasteful Spending by a Corrupted State.  California is Everything that is Wrong with Democratic Socialism.

This move to completely destroy LA County is not about safety, it’s about driving the plane into the ground as fast and as hard as possible.  This closure extension is nothing more than a cynically opportunistic political ploy designed to remove any obstruction to a Massive Federal Bailout of what can only be considered Criminally Fiscal Behavior, approved then ignored by an Elitist Voting Base.  The ‘I’m Smarter than you Kids’ have dug a hole they can’t get out of… as we have been warning them they were doing.

Folks… we are being played for chumps.

So here we are… are we going to allow that to happen?

 


Socialism is Dead!

Or is it?

The Wu-Tang Flu has parted the clouds which have long darkened our skies and shined the bright light of Truth upon us! Hallelujah!
Here’s what we know:

Don’t use Public Transportation.
Don’t use Public Education.
Don’t use Public Restrooms.
Don’t use Public Streets.
Don’t use Public Facilities of Any Kind… and Certainly Don’t Count on them to work as Promised.

Why? Because you’ll DIE. 

And, if in the off chance you don’t die, you’ll kill Granny just by visiting her…  you selfish, murdering, toilet paper hoarding A-Hole!

The lesson here is, buy your own car, own your own home, cook your own food, don’t pick your nose, poop in your own bathroom, home-school your kids or use private schools with small class sizes, take ownership of the streets and roads around you as well as your communities like… we… used… to.  Live at your own risk.

Of course, the “Never Let a Good Crisis Go To Waste” crowd is screaming for MORE GOVERNMENT! But I ask you, how is that Universal Health Care working for the Italians, Germans, French, Indians, Iranians, Chinese, etc. etc? Do the Mass Grave/Burn Pits come ‘free of charge’ because of their ‘amazing’ health schemes?  Yes, yes they do.  Cool! We definitely need some of that…

In the end here’s what the takeaway is, we might as well have been attacked.  Look at this like WWIII.  This virus appears to have been crafted intentionally if not released intentionally. 

We as a nation are more vulnerable now than ever in history exactly because we have abdicated our personal responsibility to nameless, faceless, bureaucrats who happily accept that power over us.  We have chosen via the people we have elected to live at everyone else’s risk.  You all know the old adage, “When Everyone Owns It, Nobody Owns It.”  Look around… it’s true.  This very horrible, bad, terrible idea is being demonstrated for all the world in real-time.  

Now there is no time.

So the Socialism that has permeated modern America should now be dead for all time.

Or, will we collectively beg for more of what got us here?

And, hoard Toilet Paper…

(As an aside, you might also note that living in a Big City is a bad idea.  Pushing your Grandparents into a Nursing Home is a bad idea.  Using Public Schools as Baby Sitters is a bad idea.  Not Saving a Dime is a bad idea.  Taking your sh*tty politics to places that are doing just fine and changing them into the sh*thole you just had to escape from is just Bad.  Hoarding Sh*t you can’t eat or has a short Shelf Life is also Ba… no, that’s just stupid.  I hope you enjoy every spoonful of your piping hot bowl of toilet paper.  As I tap this out it becomes clear how we got here.)

[For Karen.]


Donna Brazile Auditions for MSNBC

images

Donna Brazile sees an Opening at MSNBC for her own show.

With the Sudden Departure of Chris Mathews, Ms. Brazile takes an opportunity on Fox News to Audition for her own show.  (Does she remember Ed Schultz?)

Link Here: https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2020/03/03/donna-brazile-meltdown-shouts-go-to-hell-at-rncs-mcdaniel-alleges-russian-talking-points/


Stephen King is Still Alive

File Photo- Stephen King

 

Today I learned that Stephen King is still alive.

It was by accident as I happened to be reading a story regarding the Impeachment of Donald J. Trump and the very real possibility that some Democrats may not vote in favor of all or any of the charges/articles being presented to the Legislature for consideration.
Apparently Jared Golden (D-ME) has voiced the intent to vote for only one of the articles. Being that “ME” stands for Maine and that is where Mr. King is buried… sorry, not yet buried as of today… it hit close to home so to speak.
It turns out that President Trump’s use of power to dismantle 70 years of socialist utopian enterprise is offensive to Mr. King and as far as Mr. King is concerned represents an abuse of power. It also seems that Mr. King is in favor of U.S. Politicians forcing foreign companies to install their family members onto Boards of Directors which supply annual incomes in exchange for influence in U.S. policymaking. And because of this Mr. King recognized that President Trump’s request to investigate such behavior in the spirit of positive cooperation between the United States and Ukraine is clearly extortion on the part of President Trump.
All of that being said, Mr. King is adamant that Representative Golden (D-ME) vote for BOTH articles of impeachment because this Anti-Socialist Tyrant in the White House must be stopped.  If Rep. Golden decides not to do so, Mr. King has promised to unleash the fury of the undead masses to defeat him during the next election cycle.
I feel sorry for Rep. Golden. It is an impossible task to suddenly have to fend off a preternatural enemy from the grave… no, sorry again… from some creepy isolated locale hidden in the snowy woods where even birds dare not fly…
I wish you luck, Jared.
If you suddenly see Kathy Bates, anywhere, contact the authorities.
As to Stephen King, I will add him back into the pool.


Over the Hill and Through the Woods…

…to the Drunk Uncle’s House we go.

It’s that time of year again. Seems like it was just last year…

Occasionally I like to share certain things allowing a brief glimpse into my exceptionally average life. This year it will be the formula for my Turkey… which is my responsibility. I’m not complaining, it allows me to support some sense of sanity.

(Note: I have no issue killing Turkey’s.  It’s the heinous acts perpetrated upon them after they’re dead that I’m trying to stop.  You people are sick.)

Enjoy.

So Easy it Should be Illegal Turkey, Stuffing and Gravy.

Start gathering the below crap together FIRST…

Day before ingredients:

Brine:

2 cups Salt

½ cup Sugar

Thing to put Turkey in overnight:

(1) Large portable, sealable container

Day of Turkey ingredients:

(1) 12-15 pound Turkey w/giblets

String

BIG Roasting Pan – the Aluminum throw away ones are fine. You typically get 3 to a pack… so you can make hats out of the other two. Perfect!

3 – 12oz. cans Chicken Stock, or bullion, or make your own from the chicken in your neighbor’s yard. I’ve done all three and other than time… effort… and years of lying about what happened to the chickens, it’s all about the same.

1-stick butter (soft)

½ cup O.J.

1-sliced apple

5-sprigs Thyme

5-sprigs Rosemary

5-sprigs Sage

3-sprigs Savory

5-peeled carrots

2-medium onions or 4 large shallots chopped

2-cups chopped Celery

6-slices bacon

Day of Gravy ingredients:

2-shot’s Dry Sherry

1-pint whipping/heavy cream (optional)

2-tablespoon’s Corn Starch or a “cold rue” which is just equal parts butter and flour mashed together until you get a paste. I find the rue easier to use.

2-clove’s Garlic

1-teaspoon Ground Paprika, deepens the flavor and helps make the gravy yellow.

Day of Stuffing ingredients:

2-bags Pepperidge Farms Stuffing (Any variety… I like Country) I know it’s cheating… and? (If you want to dry out your own bread, OK. Cube it and dust it with garlic salt and Sage/Thyme/Rosemary then bake till hard, dry and slightly brown.) By the time you’re done with the above cubing, dusting and baking you could have bought the bags, spent less money and time with nobody being any wiser. There’s plenty of work ahead for everybody to be impressed.

Gather all of this stuff around you within easy reach FIRST. It will go much faster and you’ll remember everything when you need to remember it.

Day before instructions:

Step 1.  Pour 2 cups Salt and ½ cup Sugar into the container. Add water to dissolve.

Step 2. Place thawed Turkey (with giblets still in neck cavity) into the container.

Step 3.  Cover with water completely and seal/close the container. (Yes, I know it floats.)

Step 4. Place the container outside, if not below freezing, overnight. If it’s freezing, then put it in the garage. The object is to keep the Turkey COLD so nobody dies… there is no point in killing anybody, at least on Thanksgiving. Don’t worry too much, I’ve done this for 20 years and never killed anybody, yet… on Thanksgiving… day… before 5pm… except that once…

Day of Turkey Instructions:

Step 1.  Remove all but a lower rack in Oven. Pre-heat to 250 degrees.

Step 2.  Remove Turkey from container and drain well. Remove giblets (That’s all the gut’s stuffed inside which they have helpfully enclosed in a blood soaked bag.) and put into pot on stove. (We’ll come back to them) Pat dry the Turkey with paper towels. This will make it crisp. I’ve seen people use a hair-dryer… if you’re so inclined. If you choose to do this, adopt a 1000-yard stare and don’t explain it to anybody.  It makes Thanksgiving so much more fun when they think you’re insane.

Step 3. In large Roasting Pan add onion, then celery and place carrots at an angle lengthwise in pan. (i.e./////) The Turkey will sit on them keeping the Turkey off the bottom of the pan. OR, just buy a roasting rack. But that costs money and all of this was designed to just throw it away when you’re done. Your choice.

Step 4.  Add 3 cans of Chicken Stock to pan.

Step 5.  Place Turkey in pan on top of carrots.

Step 6.  Insert/shove/massage apple slices and herb sprigs (saving a sprig of each for gravy) into Turkey cavities front and back, tie legs together with string. (The TURKEY LEGS… seriously… I worry about you people. Sometimes I think you’re being funny, other times not so much.) Now for the gourmet secret; I like bacon wrapped around the wing and leg tips to keep them from burning or browning too much. This is easier than using string that is difficult to tie and leaves marks on your bird. USE THE STRING ON THE LEGS, but then take strips of bacon and wrap it around the tips of the wing and lay directly on top of the legs. You’ll amaze your in-laws by being sooooo smart.

Step 7. Mix butter and O.J. together in a bowl. Wash your hands. (You probably should have done this earlier… but I know how you are.) Now apply mixture to the Turkey with your fingers. It should be gooey/messy but I haven’t found a better way yet. Rub it all over the Turkey. It’s very therapeutic, and you know your done when the other people in the kitchen begin to feel a bit uncomfortable. It shouldn’t take but a couple of minutes. I like a little extra salt and pepper on the outside too, but it’s up to you.

Step 8. Place it all into preheated oven. Set a timer for 1 hour for each 3-1/2 pounds of bird. Remember, this isn’t your mothers bird. We are NOT taking all this time to burn the crap out of it or dehydrate it for future generations. There is NO stuffing on the inside, thus it will cook faster at lower temperatures than usual. If anyone tries to argue with you, stab them. (Be careful not to kill them… refer to Day Before; step #4)

Step 9.  Baste this thing about every 30 minutes until the last 2 hours and while you’re in there make sure the fluid level is OK. Then, LEAVE IT ALONE. This will make it crispy. I did say leave it alone, didn’t I?

Step 10. Remove Bird and transfer to Turkey plate (the giant plate with fancy crap on it that is located in the very back of your cupboard because you haven’t used it in years… if ever. Typically a gift from much older relatives given to you when you got married with the idea that you would be possessed by Norman Rockwell and don the June Cleaver pumps and pearls. (That goes for the guys too, you know who you are.)) Remove any bits of bacon and toss back into pan. Just kind of gaze upon the bird… gently/lovingly. If you act this way the in-laws will either think you’re “in the zone” or dipping into the sherry and pain killers. Either way they will leave you alone, which can be nice during the Holidays.

Day of Gravy instructions:

Step 1.  Add water to giblets (guts) sitting on stove. Turn on to medium heat at the same time you put the Turkey in the oven and bring to a boil. You will have to periodically add water, as you are boiling these things to death. That’s the point, we are making a stock for gravy. Boil, boil, boil.

Step 2. Add left over sprigs to the pot.

Step 3. Add crushed or chopped Garlic.

Step 4. Add Dry Sherry. If you have purchased a bottle for this occasion, we’ll use relatively little of it. So go ahead and have a shot… that’s right… from the bottle. It’s OK, nobody’s looking! They do it at home too, go ahead… OK, that’s enough, put it down. PUT IT DOWN.

Step 5.  I like to add my salt here, to taste, so I don’t have to worry about it later. It also saves lives… as I don’t have to hear anybody bitch about how much salt I choose to use or not use, and then be forced to challenge Day Before; step #4.

Step 6.  Time the boiling process for it.  It should be reduced to about half of the pot when the Turkey has 30-minutes left. When the timer hits 30 minutes left on the Oven, strain the liquid and giblets (guts) from the stock. Again, set the giblets (guts) aside to cool, as you will use these for their “meat” and put it back into the gravy.

Step 7.  Put the liquid back on to boil.. Allow to simmer until it just barely starts to taste right.

Step 8.  Add Paprika and stir. It should turn yellow… right?   (No?  Throw everything away.  Just kidding… it will turn yellow.. er.)

Step 9. Dissolve cornstarch well in 1/4 cup of very cold water. Pour quickly into lightly boiling liquid. Bring back to a boil. The gravy should begin to thicken immediately with NO LUMPS. Follow my directions and NO LUMPS. If you’re using the “cold rue” then stir it in gradually with a whisk. (If you have a hand blender then screw it and dump it all in, just blend it in the pot till smooth. Then have a shot of sherry celebrating your ingenuity.)

Step 10. If satisfied with texture (if not, you can add a little more cornstarch, or rue, but don’t over do it) and the flavor, turn it to low and check occasionally. It’s ready to serve.

Step 11. (Optional) I like to peel the meat from the neck bone and chop up the giblets very small then put back into gravy. It adds a great flavor as well as texture, and improves the appearance. It’s up to you, but I recommend it.

Step 12. (Optional) If you find the relatives wanting to “share the spirit of the season” with you troubling… you may want to consider hurling the now empty Dry Sherry bottle through the closest window in a brief but explosive fit of inexplicable rage. Nothing says “Happy Thanksgiving” like the jolly sound of a loud, lone, angry voice and the merry tinkle of shattering glass. If this hits too close to home, feel free to ad-lib, just don’t mess up the food.

Day of Stuffing instructions:

Step 1.  Locate all the good stuff in the now still warm, but Turkey-less roasting pan. Remove carrots and chop. Yes I know their hot, if you can’t stand the heat get out of… I can’t remember how this quote goes but I think it ends with Sherry.  Throw chopped carrots back into pan.

Step 2.  Open packages of stuffing bread and throw (THE BREAD, NOT THE BAGS) into pan. STIR WELL ONCE! Cover with foil and leave it alone. If you fiddle with it, it will turn to mush.

I SAID NO FIDDLING. It will be ready to stir again in five minutes and serve in about 10 minutes. (I like to add an entire stick of butter and allowing it to melt prior to throwing in the bags of bread, but it’s your call.)

Well all right then… you’re finished!

Serve it up however you would like. I no longer care.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!  or, whatever…

IF IT’S STILL IN YOUR HAND, PUT THE SHERRY DOWN AND GO TALK TO THE RELATIVES, or open another bottle of Sherry and don’t talk to the relatives.  Either way is a path to something unhealthy.

We could go over potatoes but everybody has their own way of doing it and they all equally suck.

Cheers! – Mike


Joe Biden is Shovel Ready

A little somethin’ caught my eye this morning on Twitchy.  (here)

Apparently, Joe Biden decided to haze President Trump regarding infrastructure.

(Holy Mouse Turds!)  Sorry… let me put it another way… I must admit I perk up a bit when I hear this phrase as I, among many of us, thought we spent ONE TRILLION DOLLARS on infrastructure projects during the 8-year Obama/Biden Administration. This, of course, leads me to the next logical question.  WHERE THE H*LL DID THAT MONEY GO?

But Joe insists that the infrastructure is Crumbling.

I insist that it is Joe that is crumbling… as well as stumbling and bumbling.

Maybe he’s just dipped into his son’s stash?

Anyway,

Take a trip with me down memory lane and regurgitate the ever so familiar Obama talking point “Shovel Ready Jobs”.  A quick Google search of “shovel ready jobs” yields 8,160,000 articles.

Many of us here already know that money was wasted, or simply used to replenish Union Coffers to then be sent back to Democrats via campaign donations.  That’s when we realized that Shovel Ready actually related more to the process of cleaning up after your dog.  But I digress.

Very, Very, Old Joe might need to Shut the Pfluck Up…

…as he is the only thing that’s Shovel Ready.

One might begin to think that the only reason he’s running for president is the act in itself appears to provide immunity from 3rd parties investigating past sins… (Who knew?!)

I’m sure that’s not the case.


Schiffing Their Pants…

File Photo - Rep. Adam Schiff (D-CA)

File Photo – Rep. Adam Schiff (D-CA)

I’ve been paying attention to a number of talking heads today regarding the new power John Durham has been granted to file criminal charges regarding the origins of the Russia Investigation.

I’ve come to a slightly different conclusion… but only slightly.

It seems to me that the ‘behind closed doors’ tactic being employed by Rep. Adam Schiff (D-CA) is designed to create the impression the Socialists have the information they do not. (I know.  This is far, far, from an original thought.) However, I believe they are desperate to get actual info that can be used… not to impeach… but to use for a prisoner swap. They are desperately seeking leverage.

Why?

Because they are fully aware that there was indeed a conspiracy afoot, only it was orchestrated by their fellow travelers. They know that just the timelines and facts gleaned by certain news outlets are enough to file charges against a number of those loyal leftists that occupy the intelligence community here in the US and smear a number of them in communities abroad… and they have nothing to trade in order stop it.

Think about it. This current President does not subscribe to the ‘Fall on Your Sword’ mentality other ‘Conservative’ Presidents have suffered from. So the old approach of throw out a bunch of accusations until he gives up has been proven not to work. The Left has also lost the animal spirits. We, the people, just don’t believe them anymore. Even those that profess to believe the latest outrage directed at this president really know that it’s probably hogwash but getting rid of him ‘would be for the greater good’.  So #METOO!!!, Unless it’s me…

The panic at the disco is real… they’re in need of a fresh change of clothes.

What am I trying to say?

This is about more than the 2020 election.  (They know they have lost it.)  This is about Executive power over the Bureaucracy.  This is about what it really means to “Serve at the pleasure of the President”.  The Left cannot have their true believers purged from the very apparatus that keeps the country moving towards their Socialist Utopia, it’s bad enough that the Orange Man will get re-elected.  The need is immediate, the purge is happening now, which is why this pseudo-impeachment sideshow is happening now and not next year when the election is imminent.  (This is where I differ only slightly from those far smarter than I am.)  It has been accelerated exactly because nothing came from the Russia/Ukraine/Pussy Grabbing/Chinese Wall Building/Stupid Hair Flying Outrage these Beto’s have been flinging for the last 4 years.  They’ve run out of arrows.

The Socialists need something to trade in the background, in the darkness.  They need ‘prisoners’.  They got nuttin’ and they need it NOW!

They are in deep Schiff.

BTW –

Free Hong Kong!

(Shut the F*ck Up, Barkley. You’re the American Dream you ungrateful Beto.  You should wish it for every other human on the planet.)