Originally posted on idiotprufs:
Did you have a good Thanksgiving with the family?
Of course you didn’t; you had it with the family.
The phrase “with the family” is equivalent to the phrase “while being tortured sadistically.”
Let’s try it out: Did you have a good Thanksgiving while being tortured sadistically? See how the words are different, but their meaning hasn’t changed.
Are you nursing a headache today because getting through Thanksgiving with the family means more Wild Turkey than actual turkey?
Did your crazy uncle pull out his pictures of what he claims to be a Bigfoot, but what looks suspiciously like the stump in his backyard.
Did your vegan cousin punctuate the Thanksgiving Day prayer by loudly proclaiming that meat is murder?
Did your aunt then correct your vegan cousin by informing her that this year’s Thanksgiving dinner was…
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The Holy Grail of Truth has been found! It bears the name LexisNexis! And it quenches the thirst of all who partake of its’ contents.
Now, gone are the days when snake tongued politicians could say whatever you wanted to hear and leave you beguiled. Present are the days of refining our selection of representatives by their intellectual honesty and integrity.
As the digital age has bestowed upon us the ability to remember, or at least be reminded.
We find strength in knowing that this election cycle and every one of them from this point forward will be a subject of easy access to words, and acts, from long ago. Information previously held tightly by the self anointed.
Now the aspiring leaders and representatives of the people will be subject to our review and held accountable for actions no longer forgotten. Joy will be realized as we revel in the words of our ideological enemies used as weapons against them. And, Hope will be nurtured as those words are used to hone a new class of ideologically consistent champions.
We, the people, can now recount promises with perfect accuracy and rate performance according to what was pledged. No longer can there be the disingenuous claims of “That’s not what I said!” or “That’s not what I meant!” as all is now available to any who will listen… and watch.
Hear the lament of those who held sway over opinion… an overt pine for the bygone days of Information Monarchies and Editorial Princes. But don’t find truth there…
It is exactly that which they disdain which saves us. It is the crumbling of information Kingdoms and fragmentation of the Old Media Church combined with the new age of the Gutenberg Press that has changed the face of modern politics… for the better… and forever. It is why there is any faith to be found in what is a brilliant system whose primary participant, the electorate, has been mis-lead to a communal end by a Leftist Aristocracy.
So raise a chalice and,
Fear not! The End is Not Near!
(Well.. it’s kind of near. At least as close as I ever want to see it. Anyway, I’m designing a new drinking game built around hypocrisy and politicians being confronted with their own words. I’m trying to have it up and running before the debates… as that is when it should be the most applicable. As always, I’m open for any suggestions from the dedicated.)
Oh, and LexisNexis is a division of Reed Elsevier which trades under: RUK