So I’ve decided to change mine. (Just like Mayor DeBlasio… or Mr. Wilhelm…whatever…)
People don’t like me. I’ve taken an admittedly unscientific poll but the results are clear. I’m despised. There are many reasons for this… many, many reasons…
So, by changing my name I will wipe the slate clean. I mean there are a bunch of people out there who haven’t met me yet and my reputation under my old name can’t precede me. All I have to say is “That’s not me.” It will be like being born again! (Kinda… actually very similar…)
And, as long as I don’t get too attached to my new name I can always change it again down the road if I screw it up a second or third time…
The Socialists have been doing this for a hundred years! Once they were Socialists, then Communists, then Progressives, then Social Democrats, then Democratic Socialists, then Liberals just to be super confusing, then Leftists, back to Socialists and even Anarchists to render the term meaningless, then back to Progressives… anon, anon… Just like the criminals they are.
Think about it, “Hillary Clinton” is a way better name than “Suicide Inducing Harpy” which is what she used to go by.
Come on! It doesn’t matter what you call yourself.
Your name says it all… who cares about your actions. Instant Indulgence, without having to purchase it.
We do it all the time.
All you have to do is pick something like Catholic, Conservative, or Liberal and that’s what you are.
You don’t even have to know what that moniker means because it means whatever you want it to. Brilliant!
So what if you only go to Mass at Midnight on Christmas Eve… and support abortion. It doesn’t matter. So what that when you’re confronted with Socialist principles you cringe in disgust… you’re “Liberal” and you’re going to continue to vote for “Liberals” no matter what. You can even wear the mantle of “Conservative” though you couldn’t explain free-market capitalism if your life depended on it, and you support catastrophic spending by huge extra-constitutional government as long as it is “your guys” in charge… NO problem!
We’re finally at the point where words have no meaning.
And never worry, if some malcontent tries to assign a definition, you can just combine a bunch of them like “conservative-liberal-pacifist or liberal-progressive-social democrat or left leaning-anarcho-capitalist”, there are no rules…go nuts!
So remember, as long as you keep changing what you call yourself nobody will ever challenge you. And if nobody Challenges you, then even you will never have to genuinely understand what your new name means. You’ll Never Feel Stupid Again!
So… it’s time for me to make the change.
I’m going with “Omnipotent”. (It says it all.)
I know, it’s a bit of a mouthful but “Enlightened” seemed a to feminine and I’m saving “Super Genius” for future use.
Oh… and it’s “Mr. Omnipotent” to you. Or, possibly “Your Highness”. I’ll have to think about that.