In only what can be considered a Brazen Early Morning Assault, Domestic Transgender Terrorists attacked Fort Meade.
Security personnel on scene stated “Had it not been for the terrible driving they may have made it all the way into the base.”
According to CCTV security camera footage, the Driver can been seen applying make-up and texting.
Authorities, off the record, have stated the motive is believed to be anger over the Music Selection for the United States Army Field Band.
One Terrorist has been reported deceased and the other injured.
Thankfully no Military Personnel were injured.
Additional updates will be posted as information presents itself, Mr. Obama.